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Rules To Live By

I am no easy person to live with (Thanks, Brandon), as a matter of fact it is not easy for me to live with myself sometimes. You see I am picky. I like to say that I have my own set of rules to live by. Just a list of things that I cant do and why or things that have to be done certain ways. Can you see how this might drive one insane? (Again, Thanks Brandon!) Its your lucky day because I am going to share some of my list and you can feel free to comment and tell me how wacko I am.

Rule#1) I CAN NOT EVER EVER EVER come in contact with ANY bug.
This is a serious rule here people. The absolute most important. I have a full blown phobia of bugs and reptiles and insects. I freeze, I cannot move nor take my eyes off of the bug. If I loose sight it is OVER! Once I was carrying groceries in our apartment and a moth flew in the door. I freaked, no one was at home. My solution: Run into bathroom, close and lock door, stuff towel under bottom of door incase this moth thinks it is slick and proceed to manicure ones self until boyfriend comes home to kill moth. He arrived home...THREE hours later. I was still locked in the bathroom. But I had the best looking toenails and fingernails this side of the Mississippi.

Rule#2)No one under any circumstance may ever touch my belly button, EVER!
This is no laughing matter either. I can not stand belly buttons. SO much so that when I wash mine I have to close my eyes and cringe and hurry the hell up and stop touching it already!! I don't know why but I see a belly button as a wound. For all that is holy, something dried up and fell of right there, in that very spot. This is not a place for decorating with rings and shit. I can not take even thinking about it anymore.....next....

Rule#3)Nothing creamy or soggy may ever enter my mouth!
For starters, get your mind out of the gutter people. I mean creamy as in mayonnaise, mustard, ketchup, peanut butter and so on. I do not, have not and will not eat those things. (and that's just the short list) On the soggy side we have bread. I can not eat soggy bread, I will vomit. I eat everything plain. Hamburger- meat and bun only. Hotdog-wiener and bun only. Chicken sandwich- chicken and bun only. This makes Milos complicated, I love Milos. But I can only eat Milos inside the restaurant I cannot get it to go. I have to be in a place where I can eat that burger like it is the last thing on Earth in order not to let the special sauce get the bun soggy.


I think that should give you a good enough example. Oh there is more trust me but I don't want to scare you guys. Now leave a comment and tell me one of your picky ways or rules, C'mon you know you have them. They cant be half as bad as mine.


P.S.
A friend has started a blog of her own. I think it would be nice if you went over and said Hi.
Heatherssoapbox.blogspot.com

Only three????

LOL! First off thanks for sending people my way! You are so funny! The way you are with all bugs I am with spiders and crickets but I have a bad habbit of taking off my shoe and throwing it at the critter and then running away barefooted! I agree with the mayo, I have to have something on my burgers though so I usually have ketchup or mustand but I order mine special so they have not been sittig and getting soggy! I REFUSE to eat pudding or jello!

I could name a dozen, at least [and intrigued by your post, I may very well work on my own tomorrow]...but for one:
I have a strange fetish with odd numbers. If something/anything is countable (is that a word?), it damn well better be an odd number I'm counting! Number of ice cubes in my cup...volume level on the television...number of tater tots I eat with my hot dogs...must be odd. (Does that say something about me? Odd) :)

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